The Pride March Doesn’t Have a Place for Me

I’ve been marching in Pride parades since 1995, but I won’t be marching this year in New York, where I live.

Pride Month has always been about a political and progressive embrace of our rainbow of choices. But lately I find myself feeling alienated by loud voices among activists in the L.G.B.T.Q.+ community on all sides of the Israel-Gaza war. They’re intolerant of nuance, complexity and opposing views.

I’m an Israeli American queer faith leader and social justice activist. Along with my brother and cousins I represent the 39th consecutive generation of rabbis in our family, according to our family history, and I am also the first openly queer rabbi in our lineage. Long before Oct. 7, 2023, Jewish progressives like me protested the Israeli occupation and preached a just two-state solution. I have helped to pioneer faith-led Pride programs that are grounded in Jewish values, fighting for freedom and liberation for all.

So it’s painful to admit that I don’t feel welcome as my full self in many queer public places that once felt like home.

Many queer activists who are mobilizing for the plight of Palestinians are convinced this war constitutes genocide and leave no room for other interpretations. Meanwhile, from the other side, many pro-Israel queer activists are conflating opposition to this brutal war with support for Islamic fundamentalism and consider all criticism a betrayal. As activists on either end of the spectrum demand complete allegiance, they’re squeezing out those of us who don’t fall in line.

We’re being told to choose a side and to condemn the other as represented by bigots and apologists for murder. There is a much bigger and more complex picture of Israel and Gaza that defies the reality of Instagram reels and catchy slogans.